i actually cant stop watching love actually. its just those rare movies that really strike me. and i'm kinda amazed by how seemingly different and irrelevant stories can be inter-related and form this wondrous symphony. just like in the Seven Types of Ambiguity(book xinyi gave me) as well as Closer. oh well, really enjoy the show. and the uncut version is way nicer. cos the porn couple actually happens to be my favourite couple in the show hahaha!

anyhow, i've been having so much time for myself i cant stop thinking. you know, reflecting of sorts. but somethings cant be put down onto paper. and just deep down, i know i could have taken a different path. the thing is, it's still not too late.
things will be better. ah and i even got an organizer for the new year in my desperate bid to become a better person. and i think the organizer is a great start lol though it's still empty at the moment. and since it's christmas, i'll just be honest for once and say that i'm not proud of being so wasted everyday. and i'm not exactly at my happiest now. i think that sets the undertone of my xmas. i just havent really found something to feed my soul. to keep me happy.

and if i were to rate my blog posts. i'll certainly give it a 1/10.
(the rowan atkinson scene is showing now and it never fails to make me go lol!)

anyway, this few days mum has been overtly pissed with me. well especially whenever i show remote signs of going on WOW. and she's tried (i'd say semi-success) to convince me of what a failure i am. okay maybe not so much of a failure since somehow i still made it to the (elitist) school. but more of my want/determination to be an under-achiever all my life. and there's this little streak in me that really wants to enjoy my university days somewhere out there in Europe instead of an Ivy League (or worst still... local U) and Clare Tan was right. if i do go to an over-achiever school, i need to put in over-achieving efforts which i dont really think is my cup of tea lol. as a matter of fact, i'm not sure how i made it to HC. its amazing how i survived in SJI and HCI if you actually take note of how slack i was. sighh. now that's one new year resolution.

oh well, its time to log. just a little rant now and then. merry xmas!