mum keeps asking me why i am so tired. i slept from 8.30 to 11.15, skipping dinner in the process cos i simply had no appetite after coming back from the afternoon book-hunting with the faithfully entertaining LAD club. i kinda enjoy their company considering they are genuine friends, no malice, no politics, nothing like some people i used to be around. around my classmates, i dont have to put up a face, i dont have to be on my toes, i can let my guard down. that's why i love a12.

csc is taking its toll on me. there are so many things i like about the subject but i think my sheer inability to connect with the language itself constricts this want to study it. in addition, i think the idea that the teachers look down on me(and us) on general as compared to people who are truly good at the subject, makes it even harder to break out of this inertia.

notice, the repeated mentioning of inertia. it is, and has always been, a problem of mine.

on a happier note, i think SAT seems less daunting, at least the word list is not exceptionally hard besides those few really queer words. i remain upbeat about my future. i have time, that is if i start now. and i'm slowly warming up, though, hopefully i can do so faster.

i think i am happy. at least i am not sad. the art of always looking on the bright side makes life so much more bearable and opens the door to many possibilities. work hard people, and more importantly, enjoy life.